written by Ava Emasova aka faerielover
I don't even know
what date it is. Oh, apparently, according to my computer, it's 28 April 2012.
Hello, Time! I didn't see you there, you ran by so quickly.
Aaaanyway. These
days I've been discovering some very important truths about myself. Like, for
example, how I want to have my cake and eat it too. I get this feeling that
life is beautiful and that I can do whatever I want. That kind of hopefulness
and euphoria I haven't had in a while. And I decided to go for it. Why keep
whining about how out of shape I am, and do nothing about it? Today I went out
for a long walk and a run. It was awesome. I also ended up on some swings,
enjoying myself immensely. My mp3 was on, of course, and somewhere between my
running and quick-walking Lana Del Rey sang in my ears: "Hey, Lolita, hey..."
At one point in the song she said -- "I want my cake and I wanna eat it
too," and I was like -- she did not just say that, did she? Awesome. And I
instantly remembered that gif of Darren Criss saying the same thing. I love
those people!
I believe that
anything good in life can be accomplished only by first becoming the person
that you want to be. Building and perfecting yourself to be that person. I want
to be a better person in every possible way. I want to be smarter, to always
learn new things. Less judgmental. I want to be open minded. Kind. Fun and relaxed. I want
to speak more languages. {Speaking of, I started studying German about a month
ago. ^_^} I want to learn how to dance! I want to dance even if I don't know
how. And if it takes some work, an actual effort, even better! I don't want to
be some lazy loser, just complaining about everything, complaining about the
world, while sitting comfortably at home doing nothing to change anything about
herself {himself}, let alone the aforementioned world. It's all in the attitude.
Instead of the usual: "I want to do this, but I can't," I have a new
one -- I CAN DO IT. I'M GONNA DO IT. THANK YOU. BYE.
So, am I a bloody
coward? {This is just my inner Ronald Weasley popping up!} Yes? Well then, I'll
learn to be brave. Start with small things.
Like bugs. Don't
kill bugs or scream when you see one of them. What do you have against them,
anyway? {Except that they look kind of ugly.}
Slide down the
Cobra pool slide, even though it looks scary when you first climb up. {That turned
out to be amazing!}
Don't be so shy. Go
to that casting and give it your best shot. Leave your worries behind -- it's
supposed to be fun, not scary. And it's not really scary, so why get all
flustered about it? {I actually got a small part! :O Yay!}
Jump from a swing.
I'm too big to hurt myself that way, anyway.
Do I want to be a
writer? Just start writing and write every day. It's not like you can become a writer any
other way. And if it isn't working, or you simply suck, well... at least you
tried and that's better than giving up in advance.
Do I want to make
jewelry? Well, search the web for more information, learn what you need to
know, find materials that you need, study other people's work. Get started!
I guess what I'm
trying to say is -- my new motto is -- JUST DO IT. {Don't whine about it.} And
DON'T GIVE UP, NO MATTER WHAT OTHERS SAY, IF IT'S WHAT YOU WANT FOR YOURSELF,
WHAT MAKES YOU HAPPY. {Unless, of course, hurting other people is what makes
you happy, in which case just stop, that's not cool.} And I WANT TO HAVE MY CAKE AND EAT IT TOO.
Goodbye for now.
xoxo
